polyoz.net.au

Maintenance Window: 19/03/10 02:00 AEDT - 19/03/10 02:45 AEDT

This site will be unavailable for a period of approximately 15 - 30 minutes as part of the second step of a network upgrade. A new firewall cluster will be installed to improve security and scalability of the core network.

Maintenance Window:
Starting Friday morning 19/03/10 02:00 AEDT - Ending Friday 19/03/10 02:45 AEDT
A maintenance window of 45 minutes has been scheduled for this upgrade,  although the expected downtime is 15 - 30 minutes.

Please note:
Every effort is made to accurately represent the maintenance window,  time frame, and level of customer impact. However, due to factors  outside our control we may need to either start maintenance late or  complete the maintenance window late. Thus, the time frames, and  customer effects specified above, should be considered approximate and  subject to change.

Last update : 12-03-2010 16:53

Suggested publications: Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan, Cleo

Angie* was introduced to Ray* by a co-worker. She didn’t know much about him at all, but sometimes when she was waiting to cross the road in the mornings on her way to work she would see him kiss a woman goodbye at the front of their workplace. Angie just assumed that the woman was his girlfriend, and thought no more of it.

At work their paths crossed more often, and their conversations were quite professional until one day Ray cracked a joke and made Angie laugh. Their friendship developed and she found herself talking about her own relationship problems when they’d go for walks in their lunch hour. One day, Ray said, “You do know that I’ve got a girlfriend, don’t you?” He went on to say that he was still married and living together with his wife and children, and that his wife knew about his girlfriend. Ray explained that they were in an open, polyamorous relationship.

When Ray got a message from his wife, Liz*, saying that she had arrived at her lover’s house to engage in some afternoon delight, Angie finally understood. She found this confronting, but also liberating. Hearing that two adults could have an honest and open relationship with such a high level of communication was astounding to her.

Angie and Ray’s relationship became closer and eventually they found themselves in a physical relationship. Ray told her that he openly discussed their relationship with his wife, and of Liz’s positive reaction to the events. A week later, Angie met Liz.

*Names have been changed to protect identities

Polyamory means many loves, and it is the term used to describe the practice of ethical non- monogamy. In our modern society, monogamy is still considered the most common way of cohabiting. Honesty is sacred, and infidelity is one of the lowest blows anyone can deliver to their partner. But there are people in our society who live in a different world. These are the non- monogamous amongst us, who believe that they can love more than one person at once and be ethical, open and honest with their significant other.

Shane Jones, webmaster of the Australian polyamorist website PolyOz.net.au and practicing polyamorist, believes that we are all able to love more than one person at once. “I can love my parents, I can love my kids, I can love my siblings; why can’t I love someone outside that nuclear circle? Sure, I love all of the aforementioned on different levels, but it is still love.” Jones is quick to point out that polyamory is not swinging, as they are decidedly different. “Swinging is about sexual gratification – the enjoyment of sex without the emotional attachments involved in a romantic relationship. Certainly friendships can develop from swinging but from my experience they never go any further than a mutual enjoyment of sexual encounters.”

Jones inherited a polyamory mailing list from an e-friend and went on to form the PolyOz website in 2001. Currently there are nearly 700 members on the mailing list and over 500 on the website – and 65 % of members are women. “It seems women are more open than men. Yet although those figures sound impressive, the actual numbers of active members would be far lower – most likely below 100, combining the mailing list and the website. I have found the Australian Poly Community quite backward in coming forward. They are very reluctant to submit articles and reports so that others can learn about our lifestyle and what is happening within the community as a whole. I have attempted to bring it together in a central location that can refer people on to local autonomous groups.” full story

Last update : 14-11-2009 07:51