PolyOz

Time and time again the subject of sex and jealousy is raised in discussions about our lifestyle, in this article from his Blog, Polyamory Paradigm gives us his view on the subject:

Recently I was talking with a partner of mine about her potential new lover who is a contradiction to her normal tastes and desires. Being a bit confused, I asked some questions to which I got a response that surprised me. Referring to her potential new partner she said, "We are poly. You know I'm going to sleep with other people so I didn't think you would care."That got me to thinking about conversations I've had with potential new partners of my own. One of my relationship rules is that I know about any new sexual partners they acquire before we have sex together again. Let me be clear with that one. It isn't that I must know before they have sex with a new partner (though that is my preference), I want to know they have had sex with a new partner before I have sex with them again so I can gauge my feelings about safety. Often the response I get to that rule is much like the one my current partner gave; "You're poly. Why would you care if I sleep with someone else?"

This is the question that Shane and I are asking ourselves at the moment . Today I went and gave notice to the Office of Housing that I am moving out. Shane and I have found it alot harder to find a large enough house for us all to live in than we thought it would be. So we treid just Mathew and myself moving in and leaving my oldest son Ashley to experince batcherlor life on his own in my old house while we find a bigger house unfortunately for me this didn't work I think the emotional upheveal of this year has been more than Ash could cope with so I was left with 2 choices either move back into my place fulltime or talk to Shane and see how we make it work with all of us living at his place.

I am extremely greatful to Seeker who has been living at Shane's place. He very very kindley agreed to move out so Shane, myself and our kids will have more room. Now we just need to figure out a way to make all the furniture fit. The only ideas we have come up with is get in a skip and toss our collection of built up junk, give some away and let seeker loan some of it and then cross our fingers and hope for the best with the other stuff we have. I have been told I should give my ex the two weeks to come and take any of the furniture he wants but I think i will be nice and put it in storage for a few months so it gives him time to arrange to collect it if he wants to.

This weekend we arre also hoping Helen will be coming up. This will give us all a chance to sit down and talk through any concerns any of us may have. I'm still not sure how I will be when Helen is around as I have gotten very used to have Shane and the kids all to myself. I have talked to Shane and told him if I seem to be pulling back from him it is not because my feeling for him have changed its just the way I will be coping with the change of having Helen there. He now knows this and hopefully wont get worried that I am tring to run away. Hopefully we will have found more of the floor and flat surfaces at Shane's house as I have been moving my things over bit by bit and at the moment the master bedroom looks like a bomb has gone off in there.

Thats all from me for now so cheers Tigersgirl.